Help! Girlie needs coffee at the Edge!

Good morning.  Didn’t sleep at all last night. (no, I won’t be putting up that video thank you very much)  Up every hour or so stumbling around my house in the dark all the while hoping I didn’t step on a gigantic spider in the dark. (remind me to tell you about the arach-a-nid gargantua spotted in the master bath last week!)

Since I wasn’t really sleeping, just thought I was, I got up a little before 6 this morning.  At the slightest indication of getting out of bed, Zoey, our black Lab was up and headed in one direction.  We both ran into the kitchen (well, Zo ran, I meandered). I gave her her breakfast and the mandatory after meal biscuits (1 large Milk Bone and 2 little ones – the after dinner mint size) and then stumbled back into the bedroom.  I half seriously thought I could go back to bed and grab a few more winks. (like that ever works lol)

It was about 40 minutes later, and I don’t know what it was I heard, but I sprang out of bed screaming (not as loud as that) “Don’t give her breakfast!  I already fed her!”  When I got to the kitchen my SO was poised to put a second dish of food in front of our innocent Labrador who, by the way, did not say a thing about already having had her breakfast.  Man, was she disappointed.

Anyway, I continued to stumble (guess that is the word of the day) a little grumpily (which is so uncharacteristic of me) over to the Mr. Just Pour Water InTo Me And I Will Deliver An Elixir That Only The Gods Could Have Created Maker.  I’m really, really  jonesing at this point.  I put the coffee into the little basket, pour water into the Mr. JPWIAIWDAETOTGCHC Maker and breath a sigh of relief.  Help is on the way.

NOT!  So NOT on the way.  What is wrong with my baby?!  It didn’t make that sexy sound that tells me there is a union blessed by all that is good taking place.  NO! NOT THIS MORNING! THIS CAN’T BE HAPPENING!  I am leaning with arms on the kitchen counter gazing with disbelief at the machine that has always produced the magic Go-GO Juice….and it IS – NOT – WORKING

Yes, women are the superior of the sexes but every now and then the man comes to the rescue:)  My man came to my rescue this morning.  He diagnosed the problem (which really wasn’t so big after all) and began implementing the solution.  In the meantime, I  sit here drinking a crystal-like imitation of the real thing – lost track of how many mugs.  “Yes! Yes, I do have one of those big round, looks like you can put cereal or soup or stew in it, cups like they have at Luke’s!” 

Here’s my question:  Can I really expect to function at my usual level? Will people be able to tell if something is different?  After all, my body is used to a certain sumpin, sumpin every morning.  These old brain cells have an appetite for the industrial strength product, not the watered downed version.  They know something is not right –  they’ve got the jimmy-jams for sure.   

And what about this post? and vocabulary? and words in general –  nouns, adverbs, adjectives?  Tense!  OMG!  I bet my tense today is all messed up – past, present, past participle, future whatever!  Sentences?  Do they make sense?  Did I……? 

Today is gonna be weird.



  1. clarkscottroger · June 14, 2012

    It’s not you it’s the werld. At least yesterday it was!


    • GirlieOnTheEdge · June 14, 2012

      I know! The weird thing this morning was that once I realized I would have to venture forth “out there” without a properly caffeinated head, the pressure was off. In fact, I looked forward to a day of new “possibilities”. LOL


  2. RCoyne · June 14, 2012

    That’s very funny. What you need at a time like that is a DWWBKWTMERTS.
    ( dog with a wooden barrel keg who is trained to make emergency runs to Starbucks. )


  3. Pingback: Mr. Fix-It and the Edge of Obvious | GirlieOnTheEdge's Blog

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