Confessions from GirlieOnTheEdge – Only one called me “Lovey”

It’s a “late for the sky” Sunday.  Words, music, pictures.  3 things that can do it all. Always. All the time.  Travel, distance, proximity to and from.  In your face, the thing you don’t do well.  Emote.  Like everyone else.  Fuck it.  I’m a clark.  I do it however best suits me.  OK fine.  Sometimes it gets me in trouble.  But we clarks are the stoic, take it “like a rock”, “built ford tough” folk.  Thank God for us, eh? LOL

And yet word on the street is that clarks are not emotional.  The tip of that iceburg has been melted a time or 2 over at the Wakefield Doctrine Blog.  clarks are seen mostly as strong, controlled and a bit awkward at social functions among strangers. We can hold our own among our friends but shoulder slap buddies at the office picnic?  Get me outta there! a clark’s expression of emotion deviates from the norm. Well, duh.  It’s all in context baby. All within our context.

I love Jackson Brown.  Well, young Girlie sure did.  “Late for the Sky” was the first JB album I bought.  And damn if it wasn’t perfect timing.  For awhile it was my anthem album.    I was in high school, silently, secretly harboring my emotions, just beginning to write on a regular basis.  Writing for me. To, you know…emote.  This record, for it was vinyl, was the beginning of my love affair with Jackson Brown and his lyrics and his musical translation of those things I felt.  Somehow.

I realize this is a rather clarklike post today.  But amazingly enough, I now know there is potentially a world of clarks who may stop, stumble or mistakenly happen by here and not think this a “weird” blog (post).  Just a clark “rambling” through a thicket of emotional detritus.  See, it’s ok to walk a path and listen.  And when the time’s right, lightly kick to the side like fallen, autumn leaves, the things that needed feeling.

…”Some of them were dreamers some of them were fools Who were making plans and thinking of the future With the energy of the innocent They were gathering the tools…”

Don’t worry, Ma.  Don’t worry.

P.S.  Christine!  Translate for the scotts please?! I’m not feeling too scottian today =D

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10 thoughts on “Confessions from GirlieOnTheEdge – Only one called me “Lovey”

  1. I like the song. A lot. 🙂
    I’m having a clark kind of day, hehe. I’ve been up since 7, but I still feel like I just woke up, lol.
    More tea, I reckon.
    Funny you talk about ”office picnic”. This Thursday is our staff retreat out at the Nolichucky River. We’re going to spend the day rafting. Then, we’ll head to another town – to a mountain retreat – for dinner and fellowship.
    That’s really wonderful, right? I mean I am looking forward to it. But, true to my clark tendencies, I’m already like, ”if I wear my old comfy shorts that have specks of paint on them – perfect for rafting – will they care?” If I am ”just myself” will they care? If there are other clarks in the group – which there are – will they care?
    I realize that I’m probably too old to consider such things. Ultimately, I don’t care what they think. It’s just that I feel like to some degree, it terrifies me to think about socializing for 12 hours and how I’m going to survive that much time ”trying to put my roger on”. On the one hand, it’s going to be fun getting to know everyone better. On the other hand, I’m already nervous. lol
    Strong, and controlled? Compared to my family, I’m a freakin’ rock with a stone face. Underneath it all? I’m as sensitive as a hopeless romantic that just got a kitten and fallen in love. 🙂

    1. That’s right! You mentioned the retreat last night when you called into the Doctrine.
      It’s a conundrum I know. Best to try and stop all the internal dialogue about it now. No sense psyching yourself out before you have to! Easier said than done of course =D
      If you can access the energy we often refer to as emotional content right before you go that would be a plus but even if you don’t, you’ll be fine. You’re into the outdoors so the rafting thing will be fun and natural for you so chances are you’ll find yourself participating as your total clarklike self with no ill effects 🙂
      Since dinner and all the meet ‘n greet stuff is after the outdoor fun, most likely they’ll be enough conversation fodder to get you through the night no trouble.
      Now be sure to let us know what a good time you had Kitten. And don’t forget to take some pics!

      (“No, no I am not making fun of Cyndi. She knows exactly what I’m saying here”)

  2. Ummm, I would love to translate for you, but I’m not bilingual. Clarks confuse the heck out of me. I am the person making the rounds at the party. I am the one emoting all over you. I have never heard of Jackson Brown before, and while the song had a nice sound to it, I didn’t quite get your love for it.
    All of that being said, I’ll give it a shot.

    You have a hard time letting your emotions show. Doesn’t mean you don’t have them, you just don’t let them out for others to see. You have found a special connection with art, be it pictures or words or music, because they project the emotions you are feeling. Jackson Brown, in a way, emoted for you.

    It sounds like something is going on in your life right now that is causing you some pain or making you sad. From a scott’s perspective.

    How’d I do?

    1. You are spot on Christine. Spot on. Despite the confusion my people may sometimes cause you (unintentionally I assure you LOL), you seem to have an ability to decipher the code =D

      It is true. For me music is my main “emoting” tool.
      I don’t know why, but for days now the lyrics to this song have been playing and replaying in my head. I finally had to put it to rest! Hence today’s post.

      Does this mean if I have further need for the services of an interpreter, I can call on you again? 🙂

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