Afternoon Interlude. It’s a 6.

Works in progress. Often a ravel of frustration and reward – collecting words, arranging/rearranging words, waiting for the story to reveal itself – in all it’s iterations. Sometimes, a waiting game. Sometimes, simple practice. Let’s call today’s Six Sentence Story…practice 🙂  

Like white noise, the Maytag Performa’s wash cycle broke the heavy silence with it’s soft and steady agitation accentuating a silence, she now admitted, was years in the making. Annaliese probed the expansive planes of her mind; like a buzzard circling over road kill on an isolated desert highway, she returned to the one constant – her instinct, yet wondered…could she trust it? What if fear, her forever friend, had convinced her what she knew in her heart of hearts, wasn’t true. The life that was, that did not survive the catastrophe of circumstance, was lost; no amount of sacrifice could save it, as there existed forces far beyond her control and of such scale she could not imagine possible. And so she sat at an oval kitchen table adorned with a crisp red and robin’s egg blue and sunshine yellow striped table cloth, 4 tightly woven azure blue square place mats, staking their territory, opened her laptop and hoped with all her ailing heart, the keys would type the answers for her; channel the words she must read, words she felt she could not accept even as a part of her screamed silently “what have you got to lose?” That was “the sixty-four-thousand dollar question”, as she’d already lost it all, lost the dream, time had marched on abandoning her, a bride at the alter, to deal with the rubble in the best way she could; for as much as she gave the appearance of a pillar of strength and daring, she was at heart, after all, just a girl.

Image result for film noir damsels in distress



21 thoughts on “Afternoon Interlude. It’s a 6.

  1. clark September 26, 2019 / 7:54 am

    “…her forever friend

    nice word-groupage.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. UP September 26, 2019 / 9:49 am

    Brava! You took me back to my Grandmother’s table for a second. That table cloth is brought to life by your words and along with it many a memory. Good six. I love this day.

    Liked by 1 person

    • GirlieOnTheEdge September 26, 2019 / 10:09 am

      Grazie, Paul. Such is the magic of words! I’m glad fond memories were yours, however brief.
      Me too 😊


  3. faithanncolburn September 26, 2019 / 10:28 am

    You’ve really set a mood here with some great details. Where does this story go from here?

    Liked by 1 person

    • GirlieOnTheEdge September 26, 2019 / 9:51 pm

      Thank you, Faith. Not really sure. It’s been coming in pieces – different chunks off the timeline. Have published 2 Sixes from this wip and I’m thinking there may be 1 or two additional. Need to spend more time with Annaliese, get to know her better 🙂


  4. larry trasciatti September 26, 2019 / 5:09 pm

    It’s really good, especially the symbolism, and description of crisp red, and robin’s egg blue. You have a couple typographical errors though.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Pat Brockett September 26, 2019 / 9:05 pm

    I suspect she is stronger than she thinks. She will figure it out.
    The scenes are outstanding and absolutely drew me in to each time and place. Great writing.

    Liked by 1 person

    • GirlieOnTheEdge September 26, 2019 / 11:10 pm

      You are correct,Pat. She is very strong but has difficulty being objective about it.
      Thank you. It is the challenge of what we do! I’m glad I had some success with it 🙂


  6. Pratibha (Prats) September 26, 2019 / 9:53 pm

    Such visuals , as if I was sitting right there on that table 🙂 Wonderful suspense in there.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. D. Avery @shiftnshake September 28, 2019 / 1:20 pm

    “Just a girl”? A girl on the edge can rise up into a formidable force, and I think she will find her force.

    Liked by 1 person

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