Closure. On Sale Today. (and every day)

“Closure”. Mechanism? Tool? Affectation? What is it? A concept created to perpetuate the myth of self determination? Can closure exist without being borne of emotional content? Does it even exist at all? I’m on the fence. Of course if you Google any of this – “closure”, “self determination” and more specifically, “self determination theory”, you’ll find a plethora of scientific theories explaining it all in oh so dry language. But back to my question! Does closure really exist?

Angel Girlie says it does. She says you know it when you feel it. When the body feels it because the body knows first. Then, slowly, the mind figures it out and makes the intellectuall assessment, the determination of what went down. Closure. Then there’s Devil Girlie. Fuck no, closure doesn’t exist. It’s a construct created to support escapism. People can search for closure their whole lives and never find it. And that’s because you can’t find it. You feel it.

Can we choose closure, like when we choose not to be in a bad mood, or choose not to let a co-worker annoy us, or when we choose to ignore anything or anyone that affects us such that we indulge in that “bad mood”? These are questions I ask myself today. Along with, “do I need closure”? Is there an event or relationship that requires closure? Am I using the concept as an excuse? Holy damn smokes, I’d better not! But who’s to say unless we open up the vaults (‘cuz there’s not just one).

Don’t worry guys, I won’t be spillin’ the contents of my vaults today. Today is for posting a Ten Things of Thankful post. Josie Two Shoes provides the magic link that allows us to share in each other’s lives, in each other’s world, the ups, the downs, the opportunity to get it all out there. Providing the opportunity to benefit ourselves through sharing.

The great thing about the TToT is that, while it’s designed to share in the good things, the beautiful things, the wondrous things, it’s also a place to share the not so glamorous, sad or damn, that made me angry and upset this week things. Those are called “hypo-grats”. Oddly enough, even the hypo-grats have a way of circling round and exposing the thankful(s) beneath the surface. Come on. Let’s go scratch the surface…

TToT  the Wakefield Doctrine. Like Kristi’s #10 on her TToT posts, this is a constant. While the placement may be varied in the numbering of my post, it will always be a thankful. Without this life tool, let’s just say life would be a lot more complicated 🙂

TToT  Ya know, I’m glad to be see some heretofore mia familiar faces around the SSS and the TToT as of late 😀

TToT  Music. Music. Music. Music. Balm for whatever ails me. Motivation when it is lacking (big time of late) putting a smile across my face or giving me an excuse to cry.

TToT  Seeing the success, trials and yes, tribulations of my people (clarks).

TToT  Knowing, even without yet feeling, that everything I need “out there” to accomplish my goals is available and accessible.

TToT  Precision basses 🙂 Guess I never got closure from not buying a P bass that came through the music shop I was managing back in my younger years. It came in on consignment. I hadn’t yet bought a bass. This one, circa early 70’s, all peeled up Sunburst, looking lived in, was calling my name. I didn’t really know how to play bass then, little ditties and such, but when I picked her up, held her, worked my fingers over the neck, it was magic. This bass just played itself, the action was amazing. It felt right in my hands. But I did not act. And so a 15 year old girl, just starting her first band, bought it. (she came in with her dad) At least I was happy with the buyer, although it was tough letting her go…the bass that is!

TToT  Speaking of Precision basses – Chuck Berghofer took his ’59 Precision and improvised on the spot one day and gave us this – check it out.

TToT  That it hasn’t begun raining yet (again). The forecast was for rain all weekend. I was disappointed first seeing that forecast but now that the weekend is here, I’m not minding. In fact, let it rain, rain down on me.

TToT  I’m thankful a friend turned me on to the “new” Foreigner. For old men, they sound pretty darned good. Not all relics can pull off the rock thing decades later 😀

 TToT  Thankful to write this today. Thankful to go out into the rain today. Thankful for this, my only day.

 

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Information. The Gateway to knowing. But not really.

Good darn morning people! Welcome to GirlieOnTheEdge. Please, allow me to introduce myself. I am Girlie. Why yes, that very one! and I am your concierge for this day’s Ten Things of Thankful post. This post is my participation in a world outside of myself. It is as much for me as it is for anyone reading who may find value in, be entertained by or discover new creative ideas from, this post. Thank you for stopping by today…..

This morning, I awakened at a later hour than ususal. It being Sunday and all, before I am able to partake of the life giving go-go juice, popularly known as “coffee”, I must first take my weekly Fosomax. Yo! Dyanne! she who has recently returned to the fold of bloghop participation and my long lost sister at birth!, you know what I’m talking about. Before I can drink the black gold, I have to remain in an upright position (tray tables included) for 30 minutes. Why? Who the heck knows.

What shall I do while I wait? Decided weekly prep would be productive so…. prepared tuna fish for a week’s worth of sandwiches (which also serves as breakfast when I get to work, only half the sandwich of course), and nuked a bag of vegetables to have for dinner tonight. Quick stuff as I while away the 30 minutes to sanity. Now here’s the thing that precipated my listing, for the 2nd week in a row, my thanks for the internet and access to it. I emptied the bag of Fiesta Ranchero vegetables into the black plastic like Pampered Chef bowl, put the lid on best I could and stuck it in the microwave. It began to spin but! it began making a funny noise. As I watched it go round and round, it appeared one of the handles was bumping against the door. Well, we’ll have to fix that!

I pulled the bowl out and adjusted the lid a little better. The handles are imprinted with, “slide this way” (with arrows to remove lid). I put the bowl back in the microwave, hit the button and watched it spin once again. Only….now it’s rotating in the opposite direction! Holy smokes! What just happened? Am I really seeing it spin in a counterclockwise direction? It was spinning in a clockwise direction just a minute ago! What does that mean? Is that possible? lol Of course it is! Thanks to the internet, I googled “what direction does a microwave tray rotate?” and had my slightly anxious, playful inquiry answered (no supernatural, magical kitchen happenings today, y’all). So yay! for the internet and getting answers immediately 😀

So. As I wait to be able to ingest brain smoothing coffee, as I attempt to be productively efficient with the use of my time, I wander off into….creative self entertainment. However briefly, I imagined that “oh my gosh, did I really see the microwave arbitrarily change its’ rotational direction? Was I imagining it? Whatev. The pleasant residual was it got me to thinking, “hm…what if there was a microwave. A very special microwave that if you put a wish, desire or intention into a bowl, depending on the direction it rotates you could 1.) go back in time and re-write personal history or 2.) move ahead to the future and set in place a personal history assured…

…oh boy, where has Girlie wandered off to now? Here! at TT #2 😀 If we allow ourselves to relax, wander the creative side of town where maybe it’s not so neat and tidy, we just may stumble over a can of creativity. If we don’t venture to places unknown, to places that might appear a little scary, then what can we gain? You know, the folks who run the joint, Finish the Sentence Friday, offered up a good one this past Friday. It was pretty much a discussion of fear vs worry. And a fare bit of self revelation ensued from many of the writers in the process as they shared of their fears and worries. And you know what? As I become a more evolved version of myself, I see the absolute benefit of sharing. The personal stuff. Ya know? As a clark, I tend not to go too deeply into the coffers of the “personal” (then everyone might see what an awful person I am – is what my internal clarklike self insists) and that’s ok. For me and most everyone else, there’s a limit to what is shared as is appropriate. Did I wander down the hole to TT #3?  Um, maybe.

(can we get back to a more structured and thereby more acceptable format pa-lease!)

TT # 4 Shopping is not anything I enjoy doing for myself. It’s frustrating, time consuming. But, it is a necessity at times. I’ve mentioned the Second Chance Thrift shop behind where I work. Proceeds go to the Humane Society. A very worthy cause. I haven’t been into the shop in months. My last purchase were some cds. Can’t beat the bargain price of .25 now can you 😀 Anyway, I’m not opposed to buying certain articles of clothing that are “gently used”. As I started up the steps to the second floor I saw hanging on the wall what I thought at first was a jacket. Wow! How very cool looking. I snagged it on my way up the second flight of stairs. Upon closer inspection I saw there was also a skirt. It was a suit. Tried the jacket on, perfect fit. Looked at the skirt and decided, yeah, that’ll fit too. It looked as if it had never been worn.The material is a jacquard damask, floral type, kinda sorta like this,. The pattern’s a little different of course, but you get the idea. It’s a lovely wine (not burgundy) color on a black background. How could I not buy a perfectly fitting suit for $5? Score.

TT #5 I went to the gym yesterday. (this is huge as it’s been 2 weeks since I last set foot inside my Gold’s)

TT #6 Reuniting with friends. I recently met up with 2 friends I used to work with before I took my present positions. One of them had a baby in the interim. In get-together #1, I got to meet the little guy. What an angel he was as his mom and I got caught up over brunch. The second meetup? That’s my next TT:

TT #7 This particular friend and I work only miles apart (she also left the firm and took another position) and we try to meet for dinner at least once a month. Last Wednesday was the first time since Thanksgiving that we’ve gotten together so there was much to catch up on. The bonus was we met at a little restaurant I had never been before. To my absolute delight, I discovered some of the best pizza ever! When I first moved from Rhode Island to Virginia once a very long time ago, I thought I would never eat pizza, real pizza, ever again (unless I went home but that’s a long way to go for a pizza). I believe I have now found pizza, dare I say it, worthy of rivaling the pies back home 🙂

TT #8 I’m appreciative and thankful my brother reminds me to take “pitchas” when I’m out and about, even though it can be challenging while driving lol. So the famous #9 #9 #9 are a couple of pictures taken on my return trip from doing Saturday errands. I’m not professional with the placement of photes like Pat with her causual ability at providing simple yet amazingly accurate descriptions. I can aspire though 🙂

TT #9  

[picture far right was actually taken about a month ago but it’s vertical so…there ya go. symmetry :D]

TT #10 This day, of course. It is incumbant upon me to celebrate it in a manner worthy of having received it. So …..

 

Ten Things of Thankful

“Add New”. Isn’t that what it’s about?

“Morning. Welcome to GirlieOnTheEdge. Got to say, the most beneficial place for me is on the edge. Define edge? Hm…it is that split second of opportunity when time ceases, when consciousness is “expanded” such to allow for the impossible, improbable, “no way!” moments. Clark likes to call it the “cubic centimeter of chance”. It’s when a window opens up. Not really accessible by design, most often comes as a surprise and surely not an everyday experience.

Ahem! Yes, where was I? Clearly, in a contemplative mood. Very. For clarks, “contemplative” comes with the risk of indulgence. We can get lost inside of our heads thinking about the past about the future about the wtf present. New readers, “clark” refers to my personal reality, that of the “outsider”. It is my dominant reality and it is one of 3 personal realities/perspectives we all live in. Check out the Wakefield Doctrine here. You may or may not “get it” but if nothing else, the folks who hang out there are, well, representative of clarks, scotts and rogers! And…it’s kinda fun over there. Learning new things with a twist. And! You just may find it’s the most usefull life tool you have yet to discover.

What brings me out here today, Sunday, is the Ten Things of Thankful bloghop. You’ve heard of it no doubt as it has been circulating the net for years. Lizzi Lewis. Yes, that Lizzi Lewis gave of herself and offered the bloghop as a vehicle for herself and others to remind ourselves of the goodness and opportunity and friendship in our lives. She offered a vehicle by which to communicate, reach out, identify and otherwise relate to others near and far. Thank you Lizzi!

As Lizzi is a woman on the go, a person in motion, an individual on a quest, she realized the moment when stewardship of her hop, affectionately dubbed the TToT, should be passed to someone else. Enter side stage center, Josie Two Shoes, Wendy. She accepted the privlege and enables anyone willing, to join in and share of themselves joys, sorrows, delights, achievements, failures, wonders, success, hope fors and all manner of thankfulness. Thank you Wendy. So if you’ve a mind to, join in.

1.  Rainy day? Yeah, I’m thankful. It’s another day.

2.  Coffee. Sure, listed this before but you know what? I have a new appreciation for it. Friday night after work, I went to the store to buy coffee. Believe it or not, I was basically out of coffee (I know! how could I let that happen!). I had enough for 1 cup of whybotherit’ssoweak for the next day. Well, I left the store with everything but coffee. O. M. G. Yesterday morning I was exhausted and had nothing to jolt me to consciousness. None of the black gold, no go-go juice for me. It was an awful, haze day for sure! But I got through it. None of the things that might have irritated me had I been caffeinated bothered me. Score.

3.  Music! As shared by others. Thanks, Clark for posting the Jimi vid, Rainy Day Dream Away. Perfect.

4.  I must echo the thankful for the internet. Well, acutally, thankful for access to the internet. Hell-oo Heaven at a clark’s fingertips. Bliss achieved in every byte uploaded, information 24/7 😀

5.  Encouragement by participation. It’s funny how when you’re not even looking, when you are genuinely engaged with the world, you find all sorts of encouragement, sometimes when you didn’t even realize you needed it.

6.  Carlos Castaneda’s first 4 (maybe the 5th book) of his Don Juan series.

7.  Dogs.

8.  Flowers from Columbia. They are rainbow bunches of smiles 🙂

9.  Curiosity. This one is both a thankful and a hypo-thankful!

10. See item #1. This day is my giftchallengeopportunity. This day is my responsibility.


<p><a href=”https://vimeo.com/55844107″>Casino Christmas Sunset</a> from <a href=”https://vimeo.com/meanadvantage”>Mean Advantage Productions</a> on <a href=”https://vimeo.com”>Vimeo</a&gt;.</p>

 

Winterwonderland…not!

Hello all. It’s me, Girlie. Welcome to GirlieOnTheEdge and another 6 Sentence Story. Thanks to Miss Zoe over at Uncharted land, I was able to link up to her infamous bloghop. So, without further ado, I bid adieu.

Image result for images snowy roads

It was an awfully bitter cold, windy as hell middle of winter half day, my shoes were soaked like sponges at the bottom of an almost but not quite emptied cleaning bucket.

Shivering from toe to nose, I continued walking, the slush no longer felt as my feet were no longer of the living.

Exposure is what they called it. I’ll tell you what I call it – I call it damned stupidity!

I looked over at my new friend, my new buddy, my soon to be ex-friend, ex-buddy for pulling a stunt like she did, driving right by a gas station not 5 miles back and did she stop???!

Which is why we are walking in mind numbing cold, slush and snow anxious to get to that very same gas station knowing, for a short time, we will be warm and dry… until we trudge out again, gas can in tow.

Sleepy towns and a Six Sentence Storyline

Hey there, welcome to the Edge, GirlieOnTheEdge. It’s Thursday night. The virtual world is all a-buzz what with Zoe’s Six Sentence Story Thursday live and all. So I’m not going to babble on needlessly, I’m gonna get right down to brass tacks.

Rules of the road? Simple. Write 6 sentences. Only 6. Somewhere within those 6 sentences use Zoe’s cue word of the week and voila! you have yourselves an entry ripe and ready for the Six Sentence Story bloghop. Cue word this week is “Ripped”. If you haven’t written one, it’s not too late. Look at me! So go have some fun and we’ll see you ’round the net! 

Still reeling from the news, feet not yet firmly planted on the old terra firma, I delicately picked up the ivory colored, 70 lb uncoated linen letterhead and re-read the typewritten words, words I’ve been waiting decades to read. My agent and long time friend, Langston Fitch, finally found a publisher interested in my book, willing to take a chance, a publisher offering me a contract.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not complaining, but damn if I haven’t been waiting more than half my life for this, more than half my life to see my book on a bookstore shelf, figures now I’m half blind with cataracts! Who said God doesn’t have a sense of humor.

Mine may not be the prettiest face to adorn the back cover of a book but I know it won’t be the ugliest either; it certainly wasn’t scary enough to frighten the lovely young thing I almost ran into down to the post office today, now that was a surefire meeting of beauty and the beast.

As I held the heavy glass door open for her I sensed, in spite of her youth, that she recognized my gesture of chivalry and, as her eyes locked with mine, I damned near felt as if my heart had been ripped right out of my chest…she was…

 

 

 

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It’s Monday. SFW! (to quote an obscure movie title)

Good evening, morning, afternoon. Wherever and whenever your are, welcome. I am Girlie and this is my place for writing words. Except it’s been quite some time, years in fact, since I’ve posted anything other than a Ten Things of Thankful post ( excellent bloghop created by international traveler Lizzie Lewis, newly administrated by the prolific Josie Two Shoes) or the occaisional Six Sentence Story.

I went to the FB this evening (I try and go at least every other day or two). One of the features I enjoy (no really!) is the “hey! look what you posted this day” (insert year). And so it was that this date last year I posted a Six Sentence Story. It was a Friday. I clicked on the link, read it, thought “yeah, I still like it” and then played the music video. Twice. The second time I turned off the light and turned on my favorite Christmas gift of this year, a very delightful “kalaidescopic light show in glass cube” given me by a co-worker. Imagine it blinking all colorful like 😀 I love it.

Today is a day of birthdays. Famous people. Not famous people. Today, I was given a gift of time. 2.5 hours of time that otherwise would be spent at work. Work closed early today for inclement weather. Gift. So, what to do with this time? We can’t go back in time. We can’t move forward in time. We have only now. In spite of the weather, when I arrived back, where I live, I changed out of my work clothes and into… gym clothes. In no less than 15 minutes I was out the door and headed for the gym. What’s so great about that?

It’s wasn’t about going to the gym or anywhere else for that matter. It was about using time that otherwise would not be mine on a typical work day, and using it to do something…good, of my choosing, beneficial, fun, outside of routine. It was an opportunity to engage the world in time that, only hours previously, did not exist.

It’s a new year. Another day. Another opportunity. Whether it’s filled with blinking lights, safe and secure, filled with work deadlines, editor’s deadlines, chores or children’s activities, it’s still our time, rightWhy not accept the challenge and live outside of the box. 

Ten Things of Thankful, Christmas New Year’s Day Edition

Hey. It’s late…holy shit! 10:30?! Where in the world did this day go? Who am I trying to kid. It’s been here all along. No. No tricky metaphysical mumbo jumbo. No sir. Not from me. Not tonight 😀 Although, if ever there was a night for such things…

See what I tried to do? lol I had every good intention last night but clearly I was on the road to hell. (no, nothing fun, Kathleen’s favorite, the “road to hell is paved with good intentions”). It’s been the “holiday season, whoop-de-do (and dickery dock)” and as such…busy. But holiday or not, Josie Two Shoes has not failed us. As every week for longer than I want to recognize, she hosts this bloghop of bloghops, the Ten Things of Thankful.

OK. Let’s stop talking and open some presents!

1  The wind howling, screaming, challenging me to get up. It is, afterall, a beautiful day.

2  the Wakefield Doctrine. Check out this Doctrine Christmas post from 2013. Excellent.

3  Last Saturday night’s call in call with Clark and Cynthia. What?! We were still talking over an hour after the official end time? lol

4  Speaking of Clark and Cynthia. Thanks Clark for sharing this and thank you Cynthia for the obvious. Excellent 🙂

5  For co-workers who are generous and fun and a pleasure to be around.

6  Music. Especially this time of year.

7  Everyone in the virtual world who writes, creates, shares. Don’t stop.

8  A week ago today, my morning commute. Stopped at a red light I heard the sound of geese. The very large V formation approaches from my right. I lean in to my windshield to look out so as to follow their path as they cross over and above. (ironic they had the green light!). Cool. But wait!  They weren’t finished.  2 other V formations, 2 more skeins of geese flew overhead. It was going to be a good day 😀

9  I am so very thankful for good health, a roof over my head, a secure job, a wonderful vehicle to get me there or anywhere I need or want to go.

10  This day. The only day.