personality theories

Hitchin’ a Ride to TToTville

Posted on by GirlieOnTheEdge

What does Julie Andrews and Vanity Fare have in common? Eggs-actly. In my head only. You surprised? lol At least those of you who know me and are familiar with the Wakefield Doctrine? Go look up “clark” over to the Doctrine. Don’t know that it’s in the urban dictionary yet but it might be. Let me know will ya?

So here’s my deal. (hold up a sec while I mute the keys here…can’t have lapbaby hearing what I got to say….there….done) As I was saying, I ordered and received a new lap top yesterday. Finally, after thinking way too much about it for way too long, I committed. And, if you’d seen me last night, perhaps I should have been (committed) 😀 (Yo, Clark! The tonal was raising hell!)

See, I’ve not been my usual self in that I’ve not kept abreast of technological advances in oh, say, the last 10 years! Not my normal mo for sure but it became my normal mo. It became my routine and therefore gobbled up by the tonal. Try making inroads with that going on my friend. Sheesh. (“tonal”? concept referenced in Carlos Castenada’s first few books about Don Juan). And so I realized that at a certain age in life you either accept that you are a certain age and therefore excuse or otherwise give in to not doing certain things, or engaging in any number of activities. S’all relates to time, no? I suppose I should have studied Einstein’s theories? Would that help me this morning? mmm… Thinking not 🙂

I’m beginning to ramble now and that, my friends is a sure sign to reign it in and get to the point of all these words. It’s Saturday. That means, for me, get a Ten Things of Thankful post up and shared and start reading the other TToT posts offered in friendship and support and general all around let’s all have fun this weekendness. Thanks to Joes Two Shoes we can be linked pretty easily to each other and share each other’s thoughts and goings on for the week or so past. (Josie! I will write you for code so I can put everyone on my post too!)

Ready people? Let’s do this!!!

1   I’m thankful for Zoe over at Uncharted for hosting the Six Sentence Story bloghop for lo these…how many years?? Do I want to know? lol

2   For waking up this morning.

3   Not only for waking up, but waking up to sunshine and significantly calmer winds. The DC Metro area was kinda a mess yesterday as was many other regions. Watch out Northeast today!

4   That we had power yesterday at work. (naah, would rather have gone home!).

5   Hypo-grat right here, numero 5:  last night, while working a little ot (along with about 6 othere people) we had 2 power surges. Guess whose computer fried? Yuppers. So, in a way, if I don’t go into work this weekend for lack of a computer, it won’t be the end of the world because….drumroll please….

6   New laptop.

7   Future thankful:  that I complete the set up of said new laptop, today.

8   the Wakefield Doctrine.

9   the ease with which this post was written today. (could it be the extra caffeine?? 3 mugs ‘o the juice and we good to go!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 😀

10 Jesus Jones for titling a song “Right here, Right Now” because sometimes the little ear/mind worms that won’t leave us alone can push us along, lead us to living in the right here, right now. In the present. And practically speaking, is there any other place you’d rather be? (no, really guys, think about it. the possibility is in the now, not the then, not the maybe could be. reach out, eyes closed. surprise your self)



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Closure. On Sale Today. (and every day)

Posted on by GirlieOnTheEdge

“Closure”. Mechanism? Tool? Affectation? What is it? A concept created to perpetuate the myth of self determination? Can closure exist without being borne of emotional content? Does it even exist at all? I’m on the fence. Of course if you Google any of this – “closure”, “self determination” and more specifically, “self determination theory”, you’ll find a plethora of scientific theories explaining it all in oh so dry language. But back to my question! Does closure really exist?

Angel Girlie says it does. She says you know it when you feel it. When the body feels it because the body knows first. Then, slowly, the mind figures it out and makes the intellectuall assessment, the determination of what went down. Closure. Then there’s Devil Girlie. Fuck no, closure doesn’t exist. It’s a construct created to support escapism. People can search for closure their whole lives and never find it. And that’s because you can’t find it. You feel it.

Can we choose closure, like when we choose not to be in a bad mood, or choose not to let a co-worker annoy us, or when we choose to ignore anything or anyone that affects us such that we indulge in that “bad mood”? These are questions I ask myself today. Along with, “do I need closure”? Is there an event or relationship that requires closure? Am I using the concept as an excuse? Holy damn smokes, I’d better not! But who’s to say unless we open up the vaults (‘cuz there’s not just one).

Don’t worry guys, I won’t be spillin’ the contents of my vaults today. Today is for posting a Ten Things of Thankful post. Josie Two Shoes provides the magic link that allows us to share in each other’s lives, in each other’s world, the ups, the downs, the opportunity to get it all out there. Providing the opportunity to benefit ourselves through sharing.

The great thing about the TToT is that, while it’s designed to share in the good things, the beautiful things, the wondrous things, it’s also a place to share the not so glamorous, sad or damn, that made me angry and upset this week things. Those are called “hypo-grats”. Oddly enough, even the hypo-grats have a way of circling round and exposing the thankful(s) beneath the surface. Come on. Let’s go scratch the surface…

TToT  the Wakefield Doctrine. Like Kristi’s #10 on her TToT posts, this is a constant. While the placement may be varied in the numbering of my post, it will always be a thankful. Without this life tool, let’s just say life would be a lot more complicated 🙂

TToT  Ya know, I’m glad to be see some heretofore mia familiar faces around the SSS and the TToT as of late 😀

TToT  Music. Music. Music. Music. Balm for whatever ails me. Motivation when it is lacking (big time of late) putting a smile across my face or giving me an excuse to cry.

TToT  Seeing the success, trials and yes, tribulations of my people (clarks).

TToT  Knowing, even without yet feeling, that everything I need “out there” to accomplish my goals is available and accessible.

TToT  Precision basses 🙂 Guess I never got closure from not buying a P bass that came through the music shop I was managing back in my younger years. It came in on consignment. I hadn’t yet bought a bass. This one, circa early 70’s, all peeled up Sunburst, looking lived in, was calling my name. I didn’t really know how to play bass then, little ditties and such, but when I picked her up, held her, worked my fingers over the neck, it was magic. This bass just played itself, the action was amazing. It felt right in my hands. But I did not act. And so a 15 year old girl, just starting her first band, bought it. (she came in with her dad) At least I was happy with the buyer, although it was tough letting her go…the bass that is!

TToT  Speaking of Precision basses – Chuck Berghofer took his ’59 Precision and improvised on the spot one day and gave us this – check it out.

TToT  That it hasn’t begun raining yet (again). The forecast was for rain all weekend. I was disappointed first seeing that forecast but now that the weekend is here, I’m not minding. In fact, let it rain, rain down on me.

TToT  I’m thankful a friend turned me on to the “new” Foreigner. For old men, they sound pretty darned good. Not all relics can pull off the rock thing decades later 😀

 TToT  Thankful to write this today. Thankful to go out into the rain today. Thankful for this, my only day.

 

Sometimes it’s OK to Break the Rules. It’s a TToT.

Posted on by GirlieOnTheEdge

Summer’s still hanging around these parts. Came out of the gym this yesterday afternoon around 1:45 into beaming, screaming still summer sunshine and humidity. A bit of a contrast to the fall foliage changing color thing going on. But hey, no complaints. No sir. It may look like you should wear a sweater but I can wait 🙂 [didn’t have to wait long! I needed, but did not wear, a sweater today!!]

I realize I’m a tad really late in posting but time has taken on an entirely new characteristic. It has become evasive. Be that as it may, my first TF is for Josie Two Shoes for her gracious willingness to host this bloghop, the Ten Things of Thankful. Even when she is busy with life and travelling and such, she still provides us the opportunity to link up and share our thankfuls, our gratefuls, our not so ‘fuls each and every week. Thank you J.

TF #2. Ability to think outside the box. Yeah, let’s call it that.
So last Wednesday night driving home from work I was lucky enough to have an experience that got me thinking about stuff. Why yes! thinking of stuff in terms of the Wakefield Doctrine. Another lightbulb going on moment, another affirmation of the Doctrine. (I realized there were way too many words in my describing the experience for a TToT! Whatsay I write about it in a post all by itself!) 

TF#3. I bought myself some flowers for my desk at work this last week. They make me smile everytime I look at them. “Fun-fetti flowers” anyone? 😀 TF#4. I forgot this one! On one of my lunchtime walks recently, I walked by this tree. The bark, or lack thereof, looked really cool, almost surreal…  

TF#5. Possible new coffee shop stop? Sitting on the corner of University and Main, this little shop is within walking distance of my now, not so new office.          TF#6. Decided to enjoy a walk before dark. On my return trip, I spotted this black squirrel on the side of a tree, head pointing towards the ground. Tried to get closer for a better picture but didn’t want to spook him. He was way cooler looking in real life 🙂       

TF#7. New shoes! Always a thankful, eh? 😀

TF#8. I am thankful for the generosity of one of my co-workers. A couple of weeks ago she went apple picking. A few days later she brings into work home made apple crumble pie. Dee-ee-licious! The pie was gone before lunch. Once word went out, poof! Last week she gave me a mason jar of apple butter. Bliss in a jar 🙂

TF#9. YouTube gods! No, lol cuz it’s not really them I’m thankful. It’s for something else…something un-nameable. Youtube gods in this instance because it was through the youtube that I was reminded that there is power all around us, all the time. And sometimes, it tosses us a morsel or two as a reminder. How else do I explain, through no obvious connection from previous youtube searches, the musical suggestion made to me and which I’ve provided for you today. I had long forgotten Stanley, forgotten School Days, hell, forgotten Return to Forever. Forgotten a part of my past. This was my gift. Memories that had tumbled out of my consciousness into the vast repository for all things loved.

TF#10. Each day. Reminders. Glimpses. Moments out of time.

The Edge. Still Got the blues for you…a TToT

Posted on by GirlieOnTheEdge

Gary’s dead. Unusual circumstances notwithstanding, those of my generation will all succomb at some point. Death stands, red brocade rope on either side, hand extended waiting to take our ticket, tear it in half. But the popcorn is free, as is everything at the massive concession stand beyond those red ropes.

Good morning! Hm. I wrote the intro paragraph yesterday morning. What a difference a day makes. Or does it? Do we trick ourselves into thinking “today will be different”? How do we/can we measure, gauge, what I like to call, self-evolution?

Clark, the creator of the Wakefield Doctrine, the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers, and the blog of the same name, hosts the Wakefield Doctrine Saturday Night Drive Call in show. (necessary info is on the Doctrine’s home page.) Cynthia Sageleaf is a frequent caller and last night was no exception. It was an enjoyable call and, as is often the case when Cynthia calls in, the conversation extends well beyond the 8:45 pm “end” time. Last evening, while catching up on the most recent developments and acomplishments in Ms. Sageleaf’s life, we got onto the topic of “change” and “self development”. How does it manifest? When, can we, as the subject take note to it’s effects in our lives, other lives?

You may be scratching your head and thinking, “damn! what stimulating  conversation…not!” lol…and yet, it is! We always have a delightful, engaging, often humorous exchange of life’s observations. Since Clark, Cynthia and myself are clarks, the conversation naturally is centric to how we continue to learn the language and behavoir of the scotts and rogers in our world. As clarks, it is all about understanding. With understanding comes recognition. With recognition comes action. See how that works for a clark?

If you are a clark, no doubt this will resonate with you. If not, remember the basic principle: scotts act, clarks think and rogers feel. What is the Wakefield Doctrine? It is a perspective, it is a tool. It is, for me, indispensible.

Hey Josie! You still there? Order comin’ right up….10 Things of Thankful:

  1. the Wakefield Doctrine. For the obvious, but also as the vehicle by which I made Cyndi’s aquaintance when she called in that Saturday night so long ago:)
  2. The results show the osteoporosis in my spine can now be considered ostopenia. Break out the streamers and balloons. Good news:D
  3. Music. Always a thankful. And not just music but the obvious! the artists who create the magic that provides escape, energy, motiviation, calm, sadness…the emotional engineers in my life.
  4. I am thankful for the encouragement I receive to not give up on writing. To not give up on re-learning to play my bass.

5.  So the picture over there from the eclipse is supposed to be on this side of 5. What the hell. Someday, oneday, if I have some more of them, I will work on the whole inserting pictures into a post. The thankful? I’m not embarrassed by my seeming inability to manipulate basic blog features/functions!

6. Second Chance Thrift store run by my local Humane Society.

7.  Rockin’ Rasberry Cheesecake Ice Cream.

8.  So this is going to sound weird but, I’m grateful that I still notice shit. Let’s face it, sometimes, we all kind of rush through the day without taking the time to remind ourselves to slow down, all the while not having a clue of all the cool stuff we missed out on. Observations of people, places, synchronistic events, weather, the hue of a sky, the timbre of light at a precise moment. We lose the sense of being in the moment.

9.  Dammit! Look at the form this post has taken. See! I should have put the picture at the very end. Then I would have a nice centered list with a fanning out at the end. OMG. What an old person I am. Or, is it the lack of patience. Or thinking that I should be doing something else more important. Higher on the scale of “stuff I want to accomplish”, the worrying about a future that doesn’t exist and won’t if I don’t take the damn time to turn off my brain and be in the moment right now. Enjoy it, take care of it and not look so far ahead. Afterall, there may not be a tomorrow. So, be happy with today. Funny, that also was a topic that came up in the call last night. The idea of time. How to better use it, what causes us to lose track of it in the first place and the helpful methods for staying “on track”

10.  Today. Not tomorrow. Today. I will not tire of reminding myself and you, that today is our gift. Let’s not squander it. That doesn’t mean it has to be filled with activity and “doing stuff”. It simply means we should engage and participate in “the moments that make up a dull day”.

Will She? or Won’t She? It’s SSS Time from the Edge

Posted on by GirlieOnTheEdge

Welcome to GirlieOnTheEdge. I’ve all but ceased many activities I once enjoyed and perhaps was even pretty good at. But I’m afraid I have succumbed to/indulged in/given over to, the notion that I no longer write. But I haven’t given up completely and therefore, I’ll try. For a little while longer. Hell, maybe for as long as Zoe graciously continues to host this hop.

I have enjoyed writing a 6 (if you don’t know what “SSS” stands for then click on the link in the last sentence) in the past. It is a past that feels far away, and not a little “foreign”. Why? Oh, I know why. I’ve been armchairing it since I was a kid lol

Are the wagers placed? Good. What say we find out what appears on the screen in say the next, hm…5 minutes? …

He half stumbled alongside the rain rutted, gravel strewn driveway, pre dawn dew coating his upper lip.
The light…. appeared dimly, not too distant, he could do this, he could make it to the door, into the house none worse for the….wear.
What a night! Was he recollecting acurately the phenomenal fortune he’d had at the blackjack table? Checking his pockets and his wallet, the proof was still there, neatly banded. Wait, just wait until he told Larissa, surely she would forgive him, this one time when he scored so big.

Image result for score blackjack

Hey! It’s Another Draft… I mean TToT!

Posted on by GirlieOnTheEdge

Hey! GirlieOnTheEdge here. Welcome. I completed a 6 Sentence Story last night. Finally. Except at the end, I realized I had not employed the cue word. Damn! But guess what, it’s not a bad thing (well, yeah, in a way it is) but rather a thankful contained within this post. That’s right. My 1st of the 10 is that I finished a 6 SS. Doesn’t matter to me (well, yeah, kinda does) that I didn’t publish it. I wrote one start to finish. Not exactly compliant but I wrote words that coalesced, made sense and did not exceed the stipulated sentence count. Go Girlie!

This is late to the tablet, but I am more than thankful, grateful, relieved, astonished that the racing across the residential street to get to a dog on the other side grey and white pitbull was not killed by yours truly. Holy shit damn! my reflexes are still good because it was all instinct, no thought, that found my foot slammed to the break pedal as the dog appeared smack dab in the middle of my bumper to miraculously exit on the right. I thought surely I can’t not hit and kill this dog yet, as I started to slowly engage drive, I caught the dog in my right peripheral vision still running to finally reach the dog of his attraction. I then looked in my rear view mirror to see the dog’s owner also racing across the street to get his dog (hope he looked both ways before running). So you know what? TF #2 and #3.

It goes without saying that each day I awaken is a thankful. The TF for yet another opportunity (and I hope there are many more to come) to try and get it right. No pressure there, eh? lol And so, it will be on my list every time I manage to eek out one of these posts.

Has anyone decided yet you can’t claim TF’s from the future? Clark? Anyone? Hm. I suppose it’s risky but I’ll take a chance. It’s my post after all, right?! TF #5 & #6? I’m going on another roadtrip north. To my homeland for 4th of July week. Always a TF to see my family and friends once again. If all goes well, I will also be meeting a friend and her husband irl (hint!) as they too will be journeying on the road. And the twain shall meet 🙂

Here’s a thankful for ya (but you have to sit through the backstory). I suddenly “realized” why it was that I was always walking “on the wrong side of the hallway”. That’s correct. Folks at work have been admonishing me (for the last year!) when they nearly collide with me rounding corners, for walking on the wrong side of the hallway. Who ever heard of such a thing! Apparently there is. There is a protocol to follow, protocol I apparently was not aware of. This is a first. I had never known there was a right or wrong side of the hallway to walk on until my rogerian coworkers pointed it out to me. The aforementioned TF? There’s actually 2  3. TF#7 I’ve managed to walk on the “right side” in the hallways 🙂 TF#8 is that I finally figured out why I did this, why I walked on the left side of the hallway instead of the right side…because, duh! I was French in a past life! TF#9? Why, that such a thought would cross my mind, even for a nanosecond, as a viable explanation for why I walked on the wrong side of the hallway 🙂 🙂

Hey kids. Here’s a different TF and my #10. Diane Keaton. Yeah, the patron saint of clarklike females. She recieved an AFI lifetime achievement award the other night. That makes me….proud. She stands as beacon to all clarklike females (and you too guys) that we can be successful. We can achieve. We can be….happy.

Lessons, Learning, Peeking Around the Edge

Posted on by GirlieOnTheEdge

Sunday. Morning. Been up for a coupla hours. Morning has always been a treasure left undiscovered. Eagerly anticipated as it was the one part of the day I could completely indulge. The space between each line uncharted territory beckoning to be discovered/revealed.  When did it stop being the most enjoyable part of my day? When did sitting comfortably, pad and pen in hand, (replaced now with white screen and keyboard) cease to be that solitary walk along the deserted beach, scoping tide washed sand for shells and sea glass and driftwood?

Who do I have to thank for sitting me down, right now and asking? Christina Perri? Pinterest for sending me links that might interest me? That Pinterest shared with me GirlieOnTheEdge’s post “Of Metal and Mayhem” from 2 years ago featuring Ms. Perri singing “Jar of Hearts” is no coincidence (actually it is but let’s roll with it). Whatever the cue that illicits emotional content, I believe I owe it to myself to follow the trail. Cueing the song for the 4th time, chorus now indelibly etched into my brain for the day.

Reminders. How important are they? Very, yes? Of course. Without them we might miss that important drs. appointment or job interview or teacher parent meeting. Daily reminders. We all need them. I don’t want to talk about those reminders though. I want to explore the “holyshitIforgotabouttheohyeah,can’tbelieveIforgotIcouldIforget” reminders. Life shit. Get where I’m going? Inside of your head, reflective, self assessing, time to review, pull down the shade, find a comfy chair and…review. Remember. Remember the stuff you told yourself not to forget.

As on most Saturday nights, I call into the Wakefield Doctrine Saturday Night Call in Show. Typically, especially these last couple of years, it’s Clark (your host), myself and more recently and consistenly, Cynthia. Now wait a darn minute! Nuh, huh…it is too very enjoyable and humorfilled and….informative.  When it’s only us clarks, there is much identification going on, many reveals and “aha’s” and in general “no shits!” and yes, it can be a wild time lol. Who says a three way conversation among clarks is boring. It’s not always about the Doctrine ya know. Well, actually how can it not be?

As I suspected, I’ve veered a bit off course. Retrospection, if done properly can be a valuable tool. Recollection without the indulgence of feeling bad, can be a valuable tool. Remembering to remember can be a valuable tool. Thanks to Clark last night, I remembered some things that naturally I’d forgotten. Funny, I made a comment about being in denial (the usual life shit, where am I, what am I, why, why not) and Clark pointed out that when an individual is in a state of denial, they are not consciously aware they’re in denial. Example? If someone sees white, when it is black. They see only white. They do not know it is black because for that person, it is white. So how much of what I see or don’t see has it’s roots embedded in denial? How can I know I’m in a state of denial? Does that imply someone, other than myself, should be telling me how it really is? How’s that for a big ole can of squirming, radioactive worms?! LOL

I’m fairly certain I’ve lost most folks. In fact, I may have even lost the clarks! It’s a rambling, self indulgent kinda day today – it’s a reminder today. To look so that I can see without prejudice, that which is in front of me, surrounding me. What is it I refuse to see? Cannot recognize? When will I know, how can I know those times I’m in denial? Can I rescue my own self? Gee, thank you brother. You’ve always got my back 😀

One of my favorite TV characters, a clark, was all about finding the truth. He insisted the “truth was out there”.  Am I ready for the truth? I know this clip will totally resonate with my people. Here’s to a TToT weekend for yes, this is a TToT post. The thankfuls? They’re out there. Just have to find them.