GirlieOnTheEdge Asks: Are you Listening?

Have you ever heard a song for the first time and instantly felt it grip you with emotional tenterhooks? Hooks so sharp they effortlessly pierce the hardened lining you mistakenly attributed to life?  Left hanging, stretched in places not often stretched, you wonder what just happened? Then you’re all like “I love this song”. No never mind it’s a cover of a very old song. It affects us on a level that all too often we brush aside in the name of “I don’t have time right now” or “I can’t because I have to (fill in the chore, routine)”. Music, people. It’s the doorway to another place within our own selves. Walk through it. Make the effort to open that door. You see, doors are made to open first.

Sunday TToT post? It sure is!

  1. The weather the last few days! In the mid-Atlantic it’s beautiful. Summer has arrived! Having recently emerged from 26 days out of 30 with rain….it’s glorious.
  2. Reminders. From folks who don’t care if I like what they have to say but tell me anyway because well, they care.
  3. My new job. So far so good. It takes time to learn a new job. I am attempting to be more patient with myself and ignore the internal screams of “you’re not learning fast enough”, “what the hell! why didn’t you remember that?!”
  4. That I have a rather pleasant alternative for lunchtime walks if I need a little peace and quiet. The  builiding I work in is situated next to a funeral home. Next to the funeral home is…a cemetary.
  5. I’ve gotten to the gym 2 days consecutively! Don’t laugh! That’s a big one for me😀
  6.  the Wakfield Doctrine. (of course!)
  7. My health. I’m totally grateful that I have no major health issues and that my mind is still functional, still able to learn and develop. (uh, one of you better let me know if not! lol)
  8. To my littlest of housemates for reminding me to brush my teeth at night! We made a pact a couple of months ago to remind each other every night (almost every night lol) to brush our teeth. In an effort to help a 9 year old with improving her dental hygiene, she has helped me. Funny, that reciprocity thing😀
  9. Music. New. Old. Old new.
  10. This day. The only day.

Listen for the music. When you cannot hear it, remember to use your eyes to see the music your ears are not hearing…

 

#Ode to Lila. A Sunday TToT Post

I officially walked, Kenneth Cole black leather case hanging from my shoulder, into my new TimeLine at precisely 8:30 am. Monday, May 9, 2015. A relative straight line 7.1 miles from where I presently live, I no longer have the commute from hell. No more Cowboy driving (6:00 am), no more Video Game driving (7:00 pm). The Capital Beltway has given way to a lesser road. And sometimes it’s alright to travel a lesser road.

It has been 4 weeks since my last TToT and these are my thankfuls:

1.) the Cat

2) My own damn self

3) the Wakefield Doctrine

4) My new work place. The people there are…nice. The atmosphere is…comfortable. And! They have cake day once a month (yes, there is also ice cream to go with said cake!) I’m grateful to work with a group of people who, from the beginning, made me feel welcome. I appreciate that.

5) And! I’m appreciating enjoying a new career that is not as deadline driven as my last job. I have walked this new world, for a full two weeks and it has taken that amount of time for me to re-adjust my body, my brain. It’s taken that amount of time to learn to not pressure myself to read faster, comprehend faster, do everything…faster. There is not the pressure to get it done by (fill in the time, same day). What a novelty! lol

6) I’m quite grateful for working on the 5th floor. There are a total of 6 floors, 7 if you include the basement where you access the garage beneath the building. I’ve recently (as in the latter part of this past week) begun to walk the the stairs at lunch. I’ll walk up to the 6th floor, turn around, walk down to the basement, back up, then back down and out the garage to take a walk outside. Why not? (The first time I did it I thought my heart would pound right out of my chest!) Besides, I’m not a fan of elevators. Here’s 2 new reasons why: 1) On the close of my second day, I rode Elevator 1 from the 5th floor to the 1st. It’s customary for the elevator doors to open at the floor corresponding to the button you pushed, yes? Well, the ride’s over and the doors didn’t open. I stood there thinking, “huh, what’s up with this… the door will open… now….” only it didn’t and I’m thinking, only for a split second, “shit! what if I’m stuck in here?“. I pressed the 1st floor button a couple of times. Nothing. They say 3rd time’s a charm. It was. The door opened. Well, since I’d yet to decide about taking the stairs, that little episode convinced me not to ride Elevator 1! Which leaves Elevator 2. One day early last week, my 2nd week (and before the stair “challenge”), I arrived at work and rode up in Elevator 2. As soon as I see the 5 light up and the bell ding, I’m standing in front of the doors. Waiting to exit. And I’m waiting. And waiting. WTF! I press the 5 button. Nothing. I press it again. Nothing. I press it a 3rd time and presto, chango! the doors open. What the hell is up with that?!

7) Music. Need I say more? OK… access to all the music😀

8) Lizzi Lewis for creating this bloghop and keeping it going after so many years. Often a thing created loses energy over time regardless of our fondness for it.

9) The realization that no matter how long my absence, when I return to the virtual world, all the people I’ve grown fond of and some newer people I’ve only just begun to know, are still there/here. Still writing. Still creating. Still present. How wonderful is that:)

10) This day. Right now. Each minute moving forward. The knowledge that there are resources available to me to assist me in doing anything, should I know where to look; should I have the energy and the inclination. Should I believe.

“All that it is, is what it is”. The challenge? Not to focus on what isn’t. 

Wait! Me! Pick Me, Girlie!!

But what do I do? What do I write? You’d think I’d never done this before. Ya know, write a post. At my blog. Yeah, that’s right. I have a blog. It’s called GirlieOnTheEdge and I have been for oh, so very long…

So what’s been happening? A lot! That much I’ve garnered from my whirlwhind scans of the ‘net and the FB. I’ve stopped occaisionally to read but very little. Why? What an excellent question! I offer no excuses for I do not believe in them. I do, however, accept that sometimes there are circumstances.

Are there any to support my lack of involvement in this, my other life? My irl life? Why….no. I didn’t think so. First up. Thanks to my friend, the inimitable Lizzi Lewis!

1 is the lonliest number. 2 Mondays ago, I checked my P.O.Box. There, within the dark, narrow receptacle, lay a key. The key tag said there was a package in Box 6. I was puzzled. ? And then I remembered! I eagerly opened the box and there! a shrink wrapped package that, sure’ nuff, felt like a book! and who doesn’t get excited over the prospect of receiving a book?! Thank you Lizzi for being you. For thinking of me.  For sending me Old Possum’s Book of Practical Cats. Just becuase😀

1x bitten, 2x shy. Clarity and revelation. You would think this to be item number 2 when in fact, I claim by right of SBOR/BOSR (rule # escapes me now. Zoe? help?), this to be items 2 and 3. I’m grateful, most of the time, for those sunbursts of clarity as to what life really is. While I’m immensely, please don’t take it away, thankful to still be breathing, in good health (as far as I know today), thankful for knowing all of you, thankful to be aware of opportunity, I am also hypo-grateful for the revelation part. Sometimes I think the 7 4 Horsemen enjoy showing me the “here’s how it could have been, should have been, look what you’ve got now Girlie, good job. But what it is, is all that it is, and sometimes, the big reveal is not very palatable . Objectively, seeing behind the curtain is a good thing. But in all the ways we know to be more “human”, it’s a fucking bad thing. (yo, I’m a clark). And so, at the end of this little self-indulgent, sure I’ll take a little cheese with that, outburst is the knowledge that I’m not alone. That and the fact that, with a little practice, I can stem the tide of negativity (and self indulgence), swim against that tide, and find my way back to the shore of sanity. (Good thing I learned to swim at an early age, eh? lol)

4/20. No! Not anymore lol. But I could tell you of a tradition observed every Friday at noon on the quadrangle of the University of Rhode Island (when I attended). The thanks? For laptop and access to the internet! The amazing vehicle by which anything and everything to know, read, listen to and watch, is at my very fingertips! Yay!!!!!!!!

5Side Note. My wordpress doesn’t allow comments when you hover over links. It hasn’t for a long time. I miss that. Suffice it to say, I’ve often seen the triple 5’s. Mostly in the form of time. 5:55. Alot. Do I believe in the Angel stuff and numerology? Hey, I’m a clark, I can believe in anything:) Who wouldn’t be thankful for that!

Six. Thanks be to/for the Cat.

7. the Wakefield Doctrine. A most helpful life tool.

8. Warm weather! Finally. A couple of weeks ago I put away all of my winter sweaters. I remember it was a Sunday. Unbelievably, the next day I had to pull one out of the box. Then another….and another! Let me tell you what – I started paying attention to the weather forecast a little more closely after that. lol  Happily I can report that today our temperatures will be darn close to 80. It appears Spring has arrived for good:) The trees are rapidly budding, flowers appear to have more company….nice.

9 in the Pocket. Sorry to say, lunchtime billiards have yet to materilize but I have slowly (real slow) started back to lunchtime walks. Good to get outside in the middle of the work day.

10. I woke up. That’s always a good start to the day and always I am thankful for another opportunity. In spite of all that my mind would tell me, in spite of the battle between what is and what was and what never will be, I still have an opportunity to be better, do better, help someone else find the better.

Enjoy the day. It’s about this day. This moment. It’s about choice...

Door Half Open? or Half Closed? It’s Ten Thankfuls Time

Greetings and welcome to GirlieOnTheEdge. I’d like to thank Lizzi and her last comment here at Girlie for helping me decide today’s video. It’s one I’ve used in a past post and one of my favorite Halestorm songs. So, to Lizzi and her bloghop, Ten Things of Thankful, and to Everyone “out there”, here’s to us….

Several months ago, I agreed to sign up and participate in a 5k walk/run for a local elementary school. A friend of mine’s daughter works there and of course was looking for “volunteers”, good cause, etc, etc. Being a clark and all, this wasn’t on the top of my list of “things to do” on a Saturday morning lol. May I say, now that it’s done, I’m glad I joined in the fun (did I mention I had to be there at 7 am!!!). In spite of my oversleeping, plumbing problems (I fixed temporarily? for my landlordess. not!), no coffee, rain and cold temperatures…yes, I’m glad to have participated. That is TF numero uno.

Lessee….my 2nd item might have been a TF for the last of cold weather but wait! After experiencing a gorgeous 81 degrees here yesterday, Tuesday is supposed to be…like 49. What is up with that?! But it is wonderful to see the grass so green, the flowers and trees blooming. Yeah, it’s nice. Spring is here.

3. Backstory aside, I’m thankful to live with, and have as a landlord, a genuinely kind, pleasant and generous young woman. It gets a tad “hectic” with the 9 yr old sometimes, (she’s also my Spanish tutor and did I mention she was 9? and I’m pretty sure a scott? lol) but hey, it’s all good.

4. You know, I’ve expressed thanks for my job, for employment but I don’t think I’ve actually included my co-workers. Office staff, attorneys, I can honestly say I like them all! Everyone is great and as small as our group is (and getting smaller) I’m greatful to work with such a pleasant, hard working group.

Give me a 5 spot, we’re halfway through! So speaking of this great bunch of people I work with – one of my friends there (who sits next to me) were talking one day with one of the attorneys. When the 3 of us get talking you  never know what topic might be brought up (thanks to “J” of course. I’ll blame it all on her lol). Anyway, come to find out she’s been shooting pool (or is that playing billiards) since she was way young. We traded stories from our past and now! we both are going to (make an attempt to) take it up again….during our lunch hour. Yay!

6. Being overwhelmed by reading material. This is really a combo TF and HTF (hypo-thankful). While I adore the easy availability of copius, seemingly endless amounts of reading material, it has dismayed me lo these many months, that I’ve been unable to do much reading of any of it at all!

7) Gym membership. It’s slow going. Still only making it 3 days a week but I’m hoping by tagging along with my niece to a BodyPump class I can kick (no pun intended) my fitness goals into higher gear.

8! The sky is looking lighter outside my window…is it?…could it…?:)

9. the Wakefield Doctrine.

10. Waking up again today. And participating.

Life at one time or other presents challenges. Big, small. Devestating…Somehow, find a way to step out. Out of the room, out of the house, out of your own self and take a chance. A leap of faith. Participate. In the world. Out there. You may be surprised at the benefits a little “forced” participation may provide. 

 

Yes! A Six Sentence Story at the Edge!

Welcome to GirlieOnTheEdge. Today is Thursday and right on schedule, right on time, is Ivywalker, Hop Hostess of the bloghop we’ve all come to know and love, Six Sentence Stories. (see? right there. I’m practicing the long sentences, over use of punctuation in order to extend the sentence while at the same time remaining true to the context and the spirit of the hop. Whew! I don’t know….whady’a think? Am I ready??

They were a family, this motley crew of misfits.

Oh, not by blood, not in the traditional sense but in another, not lesser sense.

4 in all, 2 looked alike, perhaps “twins”, the other 2 not even close and yet, differing appearances and backgrounds aside, they stuck together, you know – birds of a feather?

They were inseparable, traveling together always, never wandering far from each other, eating, sleeping, playing together…swimming together.

Until one day there were 3 and, not showing any overt signs of distress, they carried on until the next one, the remaining “twin”, disappeared as well.

It was sad and strange and so not right to watch the little family whittled down to 2 and sadder still when the day arrived when there was only one duck remaining who, finding himself without family or friend, wandered off never to be seen again.

 

 

 

 

#the Wakefield Doctrine. It Will Take the World by Rite of Hat

(Saturday)
Greetings and Salutations! from GirlieOnTheEdge. I’m Girlie and I will be your guide today. I began a journey earlier today, one that I procrastinated taking. For no good reason. At all. The journey? Navigating, exploring and familiarizing myself with….my phone. Yuppers. I mean, what the hell?! I have never been this technologically “behind” in all my life! I’m embarrassed to say I’ve barely done anything more than take pictures and videos (and those not so good). Hm…excellent segue…

Yes, this was the same 24 hour trip and No! I can’t tell you how the angle changed lol. But I promise you this: I will stop being such a neophyte when it comes to my phone! Sheesh. You’d think I was old or something….Hey, now..this is the blog hop that Lizzi built. It is the Ten Things of Thankful. Who on the internet has not heard of this thing? That’s right. No one. So here goes…..

You watched/listened to the vid correct? Then you heard me lay claim, by Rite of Hat, for the Wakefield Doctrine, the City of Virginia Beach. Is this a real thing? Why yes!, Yes it is a real thing. It began years ago when the first Wakefield Doctrine hats and t-shirts were mailed about the globe. As a result, there are, among the archives of the Wakefield Doctrine, posts depicting various people (FOTDs or Friends of the Doctrine) claiming cities (mostly) and sites (historical and otherwise) by Rite of Hat. Ask Clark about this.

My birthday last Tuesday. Waking up was a good start. I was ambivlalent about it being my birthday. Certainly, I was grateful to have walked the planet for another 365 days but I didn’t know what to expect of the day. Of myself. And so I simply decided, it didn’t much matter as long as I went to Safeway after work to buy my 2nd annual giant birthday cupcake. You know the kind – so big it would feed 10 kids (or me) with mounds of icing that only last week I read was, well, less than good for you. (hmph. what do scientists really know lol). You know what? I had a great day! I had so many well wishers on the FB. To you guys – a HUGE thank you. When I got to the office, I found my desk area decorated with a red Happy Birthday banner, balloons…there was even some Happy Birthday confetti spread about my desk. *sigh*. No one had ever done that for me before. I have a very sweet co-worker who waited until I’d left the night before to work her magic:) Pulling my chair back, on the seat was a bag, gift inside, from another friend and co-worker. The same co-worker who, as yet unbeknownst to me, brought in a “birthday” coffee cake from Panera. My favorite! I received cards in the mail, unexpected gifts within; I talked on the phone with loved ones and rounding out the evening, I went to the gym 😀 Wanna know a secret? After working out, I couldn’t even think of eating and so…no annual, giant cupcake. The great thing was, I didn’t care. My day had been filled with so much caring and generosity I got all the goodness I needed.

OK. Let’s talk about this weekend. The one that went to hell in a handbasket and me along with it. Before I get into that I’d like to thank Kerry and her comment over at the Doctrine. I never noticed, but Kerry said she pretty much was the last to post her TToT. I replied to her that she would have company tonight:)

Simply put, Saturday began with the best of intentions. But I soon found my “schedule” of things to do and hoped for accomplishments soon went by the roadside, tossed out the window of a speeding car, like a greasy bag of day old fast food. Spread out on the highway, I looked in the rear view mirror and thought, it’s not so bad. There’ll be some hungry birds vultures that will no doubt make a feast of my unrealized day. I kind of felt better. Decided I could/would salvage the day by resisting the tonal and find something good and redeeming about the day’s wreckage. What maya. lol

I’m damned thankful for….how to say this….today, of course. But not just the waking up part. I’m thankful that I made it to the gym and not only that! after a coupla iterations of “going to the gym” I truly had a good workout in the weight room. Baby dumb bells for me at the moment but I pushed myself. It’s only a matter of time. The getting to the gym sounds at first like a “what’s the big deal about that?“. However, it’s getting there, doing what I did under the assault of bad mood, indulgence in feeling bad, frustrated, the wanting to cry. In a nutshell, the tonal (agreed, a definition would be helpful) was at it again. Fucking with my head, drawing me into a vat of nastiness until I was at a point of abandoning/sacrificing the day to doing absolutely nothing! How self destructive of me. Realizing this, I walked my body to the car, got in and well, you know the rest.

Here I sit at 6:38 pm. No, I have yet to open the work laptop. No, I have not yet done laundry. Hell, I haven’t even taken a shower! (I don’t stink, promise) but what I did do today was worth 10 thankfuls in and of itself. And so, after posting, I will plod and persevere on. Cuz’ ya know, each day is the only day.

 

 

When Reggae Was the Rhythm of Summer

Welcome to GirlieOnTheEdge. Hang on…gotta brush some dust offa these keys…*cough, cough, sneeze*
Back in the day, which is to say late 80’s, summers meant reggae bands playing at the local bars. Not every weekend mind you. No, they’d get booked every coupla weeks. You know, gigs far enough apart to tease us, make us want more. In my neck of the woods, reggae bands were summertime regulars at The Ocean Mist and The Bon Vue Inn. *momentary nostagic revery* Who didn’t get into the rhythm of summertime reggae?

Reggae epitomized summer music. Perhaps because we lived coastal, the beach beckoned us to dance to a slower rhythm (well, except for “third wave” Ska lol). As summer would wind down, maybe late August, we’d start to notice there weren’t as many reggae bands being booked at our favorite hangouts. I suppose they began migrating to warmer climes. Warmer is better, yeah? Oh yeah. Beach? Better, yeah? Oh yeah.  And so I move to my first thankful of this Ten Tings of Thankful Bloghop

I had many a thankful in a mere 48 hours…

2.) Opportunity.

3)  The ability to be totally in the moment.

4)  Self-awareness at just the right moment.

5)  Believing in the unbelievable.

6)  Gestures from the Cat.

7)  the Wakefield Doctrine.

8)  That we are on the cusp of Daylight Saves us Time

9)  Music. Always, music.

10) Waking another day.

One Foot in Front of the Other

Where/When ever you find yourself stuck, gripped or paralyzed, think of your favorite place to be, then put one foot in front of the other…..One. At. A. Time.